Corazon Partido

Woke up around 5:30 this morning and couldn't go back to sleep. This time I actually did cry, big, shuddering, quiet sobs, for the sadness of leaving this beautiful family. They have a togetherness I envy, and I'm sure many of my friends would envy as well. It's a state of mind more than just a physical presence, and it's a family bigger than just the immediate blood relatives. Quite beautiful and hard for me to describe more at the moment...

I had so many fears coming here - that I'd feel bored or lonely, that I'd get sick, that they'd get tired of me, but it was all for naught. I've felt so welcomed, supported, taken care of and happy here. It was a true break that I so needed to refresh and recharge, and I've learned so much more than just a language.

And while my Spanish isn't fluent, it's much much much better, and I've found myself in the last few days speaking whole sentences without pausing to think. Not sure how correct those sentences were, but that was the moment I kept hoping would happen. Hooray! Now I just need to continue when I get home!

I'll be happy to see my husband and family again after 2 months, even if they did go by quickly - my heart is just broken that Barranquilla and Iowa are so far apart.

(ok, I admit I got bored a few times, but that was when I did self portrait sessions, hahahaha)

Son Diferentes!

(Just realizing a few things might not be clear- Both G's sister and his mom are named Madeline (well I think technically one is Madelina and the other Madeline), but they are both Made for short and in this post I'm referring to his mom. Paola or Pao is his other sister, and Luifer is short for Luis Fernando, her husband)

Last night I packed up all my paper crafting supplies and lugged them up the 5 flights to Paola's apartment. (That makes it sound like she's in the same building... we drove there first!) We made lots of little things for Lucy's baby shower, cutting out these sweet little poem things with my fancy edged scissors and punching out shapes in the scrap paper for confetti. We also made little stand up gift tag sized cards with embossed baby stamps to scatter around the tables for decoration. We also tied pink and purple bows on to diaper pins. We were able to do all this because V's room was open for Made and Manuel to watch Pura Sangre, their favorite telenovella. I learned fairly early on that no matter where we are or who we are visiting, we have to leave at about quarter to nine so we can get back in time for it! Poor Manuel was starting to look fairly miserable at about ten minutes to nine, as I'm sure he didn't want to interrupt but really wanted to see his show, and his daughter had to convince him that no, REALLY, he would NOT be kicking his grandson out of his bedroom, the boys actually DO all sleep in the same room at night because it's the one with the air conditioning. So that bought us a whole hour more to craft. :-)

Luifer made us little personal pizzas for dinner. Made had made me a little personal pizza the night before. So of course Luifer several times tried to get me to tell him: "Which one is better!!???" To which I always tactfully replied, "Son diferentes!" (They're different!) Both had onions, tomato and cheese. His had more tomato sauce, green peppers and it was on white bread, and Made's didn't really have sauce at all I think, and it had zucchini and stuff. Both were tasty! It was also the 4th time in 5 days I'd had pizza! We went out with the kids on Saturday, on Sunday there was a mix-up with our order of vegetable rice that we brought to the beach house - it turned out to be chicken - so I had a granola bar at the moment and then we stopped for pizza on the way home. Monday night wasn't pizza but then Tuesday and Wednesday were. Whoo hoo! Good thing I LOVE pizza!

So crafting and pizza, it was a fun night. Then to top it all off, I had a big breakthrough Skype (instant messenger) conversation about Spanish with G when I got home, which I will share with you below. The lessons he's referring to are is my Rocket Spanish grammar book that I finally printed out, after years of only ever listening to the mp3's.

G: have you studied from the lessons?

h: yep I did a few today

G: oh nice

h: it's really helpful

G: cool
G: learning a lot?

h: I told my mom that I recommended she read it around the same time as doing the lessons
h: because I think it would have helped me more

G: ah

h: it's ok, I wouldn't have known

G: yeah

h: and now it's kind of just re-enforcing things that I've learned here in the past weeks

G: that's true

h: that now when I read "this is a word they use all the time in Spanish"

G: ohh right

h: I am able to say "oh yeah, that's right, I DO hear it all the time"

G: recognize words

h: whereas if I'd done it before coming here, I would think "what? I've never heard that word before! You must be joking!"

G: oooff

h: and it's also repeating a few times how one shouldn't expect that there would be a word for word translation of everything.

G: oh yeah

h: which I'm finally starting to understand that concept on more than just an intellectual level
h: it was a pretty hard one for me to accept!!!

G: somethings cant be translated
G: oooff

h: although I think I knew it intuitively a little somehow
h: that there was something "different" about Spanish besides just the words
h: more about the way the ideas are used

G: huh

h: I'm still kind of figuring it out...

G: yeah, by being there

h: but now that I know it's true I think I can accept and absorb it better

G: helps to understand that

h: rather than resist it and keep searching for the exact translation'

G: por fin!! (finally)

h: because I think before I thought that the reason i didn't understand was because I didn't have the vocabulary

G: haha

h: but now I'm seeing that I was resisting the "meaning", or trying to understand why the literal translation was so "strange"

G: yeah

h: like, hrmm... trying to think of an example...
h: like, everything here is "que lindo!!"

G: yeah

h: which is like, "how pretty" literally, right?

G: yup

h: but it's used for EVERYTHING

G: yeap

h: and I wouldn't use that in English all the time

G: in a sarcastic way too

h: sure
h: or like, here, it's seems that people use "suavecito" when food is really tasty.
h: which is like "smooth" right?

G: yup

h: and I would NEVER say in English "man, this pizza crust is soooo smooth!"
h: that would sound so strange!

G: hahaha

h: so anyway that concept of learning the meaning, rather than the translation is a really good one to comprehend

G: yeah, and you gain that in full immersion

h: right
h: and I've been beating myself up because I understand the meanings of things, but I can't translate, and I can't USE the words myself. but now I'm thinking that understanding the meaning is just an important first step

G: yup
G: very good
G: like "me voy" (I go/I'm going, but no necessarily right at this moment)

h: big breakthrough (whew)

G: (applause)


I also had a conversation with G's mom, while doing the above mentioned lessons, about how words are different in different countries or even regions of the same country. I was saying how my mom and I have the same problem, where we listened to the mp3 lessons and thought, "ok, I've GOT THIS! I'm so ready to go to a Spanish speaking country!" But then, right away in the first conversations you have, they say (in Spanish of course) "What's up?" or "What's been happening?" or any other of 5 or more greetings I don't understand, instead of the "How are you?" that we learned from the lesson. I've learned that smiling and saying "Bien" is pretty much always an appropriate response. :-D Made told me that there's a different word for "boy" in lots of countries, I explained to her about the whole "pop/soda/coke" thing, and how if I tell the cashier I don't want a "bag" they put my groceries in a plastic bag, but if I tell them I don't want a "sack" they give my one box of cereal to me un-bagged. And the British/US differences: boot/trunk, jumper/sweater.

It's a lot to take in, but I think it's going to make the learning a little easier!

Rent-A-Lap

In this country with plenty of tropical fruits, I haven't eaten many so far on this trip. So the other day I went to the new sit-down-with-waiters-cafe at the U and ordered a fruit salad - Ensalada de fruta.

The cafe is in the same building as the internet cafe and other multimedia fun stuff to do. While I was waiting for my fruit salad I looked up to see this sign:



The next message that flashed across made it clear that there was a new service to rent laptops from the internet cafe, and not that you'd be able to have your way with a human lap for a few hours. Whew!

So then I got my fruit salad. It consisted mostly of apples, strawberries, cantaloupe and a few bits of mango.

I have an apple tree in my backyard at home...

Sigh.

Anyways, it also came with a super tasty yogurt/honey dressing. And it WAS really nice to have some fruit. And I WAS really proud that I did the whole thing by myself, from ordering to paying the check. Which was honestly all of 3 or 4 sentences, but hey I got it!

The next day I bought myself a highlighter marker from the bookstore. Also by myself. And this was even harder, because I didn't know the word for highlighter, so I had to try and explain it.

First of all I was just looking at all the pens in the cases, so he probably knew I was looking for some kind of pen, and when he asked if he could help me I said "no se la palabra en espanol pero es un marquiador(?) para (and then I made the gesture of using it) un parto de texto"

"Marcador?" he corrected me.

"Si" I said, repeating my highlighting gesture.

He brought me to the place where they were (the one display case I hadn't looked in yet) and took one out and showed how it worked and I said "Eso!" and then "Cuanto cuesta?" (That! How much?).

"En este color?" I don't know if the other colors were different prices, but the yellow one was something like $1.50. I bought it. I didn't even give him a ridiculously large bill just to make sure it was enough, because I understood how many pesos he said.

I actually can't remember if I said parto or parte or parta for "part of the text". G informs me that if I said parto that means birth, whoops! Whatever I said, the clerk figured it out anyway, and the point is I was really proud of myself to go all alone to a store where they don't speak english and get something I want, even in my stumbling way. In classes our professors know English and can help out if we get really stuck, but in the stores it's different.

It sounds a little silly, but stuff like that makes me feel a little more comfortable, knowing that I could probably stumble my way through a lot of situations. Which is good. Because in the past G (or someone, or my CD lessons) would give me some little script for going through a common situation. But the problem is, if the other person "goes off the script" I would be totally, utterly lost. And why would they stay on the script in real life, especially if they didn't even know there was one? Now that I know enough Spanish to improvise a little, it's a lot less scary to think about wandering out into the world, or what might happen if I ever got lost. Not that I'd really have much desire or chance to go wandering, but now I don't have to be so terrified of it.

Grammar classes are still kicking my ass. I can't remember if I wrote earlier that I had a mini breakdown in class the first week where I ended up crying because the teacher asked me to provide an example of a sentence in the imperfect subjunctive form, and I had no idea, not one clue of how to start. Hearing that pretty much all my in-laws and some of the professors at the U don't know much about the subjunctive either made me feel less stupid. With all this grammar stuff, I never learned it in English, so learning at totally new concept in a second language is pretty hard. And I didn't need to learn much grammar in English to write and speak well, so I'm letting myself off the hook a little, which, no surprise, actually makes some of the Spanish grammar easier to learn, because I'm not stressing about it as much. And while it would be nice to speak without sounding like a 6 year old, even at my level, I CAN communicate quite a lot, which is what I'm most interested in - communicating.

And then there's stuff like "Rent-A-Lap", and I just know that everything is going to be fine.

"Eso es!! Eso es!!"

I'm giving you my half of a instant messenger conversation I had with G on Wednesday. His responses were things like "wow, cool, that's great." :)

OH! Today was DANCE!
ME GUSTA!
ME ENCANTA!
Me encanta mi profesora de danza.

oof, she's sooo funny!

young and very energetic, she reminds me a tiny bit of Jenna and Lucia

when we were dancing and doing it right she would say "Eso es!! Eso es!!"

and when we started doing something too "gringo", like moving our shoulders or flinging around our legs, she would give us a LOOK, and be like "ah ah aahhh!"

and she was trying to teach us the rythmns

today we did salsa, merenge and REGGAETON!

and she would mix them around and say "que ritmo (?) es?"

and if we got it wrong she would make a sad face and kind of collapse like 'oh, I failed at teaching!'

soo funny

and other times when we were doing a good job she would say something about "why am I here? you already know how to dance!"

she was asking me how I dance with you reggaeton (sp?) and I told her you didn't like it

and she said her husband (boyfriend? I forget) was the same way

and she also asked me if you would get grouchy if I went out dancing with her and the other students in a club
and I said I didn't think so

"I Would Say Van Gogh is Emo"

Probably the best thing I heard all day. In conversation club. Totally made my day, so true.

Oh Man...

So classes officially started today. There's only 4 of us and I've definitely had the least formal training of all of them. Luckily 2 are from the states, so when one of us doesn't get something, another one is likely to be able to help them out. The other girl is from China! She studied Spanish for 2 years there and has been here for several months, maybe 7 or 9 already, so she speaks and writes very well! The one guy is from Florida and has been studying for 14 years through school but says he still can't speak it, but he did really well, and he has more chances of hearing Spanish spoken in Florida than I do in Iowa. The girl from Louisiana's mother is from Barranquilla, so she's been coming here for the summers pretty much her whole life. She speaks really well but says her grammar is bad.

And then there's me, who magically tested intermediate by being a good guesser, a good test taker, and I really do understand quite a lot if the person speaks slowly but more importantly clearly. I have to keep reminding myself that I'm not stupid, just not as experienced, and that I have the capacity to get to where they are if I apply myself. With only 4 in the program this time, there's not a lower level that I can go join, but at the same time, it's better that there's so few. If I was this far behind in a class of 20, I'd probably be super lost for sure.

And, one of the periods on our schedule is dance! Twice a week for an hour! At least I'll probably get a chance to rest my brain a little then, and move my body, which will be fabulous.

Oh, on a totally happy note, I'm super proud of my radio show I sent in for this week! All women from Colombia! 100.1 FM in Fairfield, www.kruufm.com online. Tuesday morning at 9 AM CST. If you hear it let me know what you think!

My Class Is In The Paper!

Today Gilberto's dad showed me an article from the paper that talked about the class I'm going to take starting Monday.

Español para extranjeros

La Universidad del Norte abre la convocatoria para quienes desean ingresar al programa ‘Español para extranjeros’, que iniciará el próximo lunes y se extenderá hasta el 29 de este mes. El Instituto de Idiomas de Uninorte ha liderado este programa durante los últimos nueve años, en el que han participado alrededor de 250 estudiantes extranjeros. El curso incluye cinco horas diarias de clase, recorridos por las principales empresas de Barranquilla y actividades extracurriculares como visitas a sitios de interés en Cartagena y Santa Marta.
(from the bottom of this page)

I can't really translate word for word, but it basically says that the University Del Norte is holding a class called 'Spanish for Outsiders', starting on Monday and going to the 29th of the month. The Language Institute of the university started the program last year and had 250 exchange students. The course includes 5 hours of lessons, teaches about/trips to the major businesses in Barranquilla and has field trips to sites of interest in Cartagena and Santa Marta (nearby cities).

Ok, let's see how I did, here's the Google Translator version, which isn't quite right either, but works:

The University of North opens the call for those wishing to enter the program "Spanish for Foreigners', which will begin next Monday and will be extended until 29 this month. The Institute of Languages Uninorte has led this program during the past nine years, which have involved about 250 students. The course includes five hours a day of class, travelled by major corporations in Barranquilla and extracurricular activities such as visits to sites of interest in Cartagena and Santa Marta.

Not too shabby, but it does make the point where I often miss a word or two that makes a big difference in the meaning. In this case, the biggest mistake I made was mistake nueve (nine) for nuevo (new), so I thought they started the program last year when really they've been doing it for nine. HA! That's good though, that they've been doing the program for a while now.

A New Idea

Since my department at work will be consolidated down to Florida at the end of the year, I've been having all sorts of wacky ideas about what to do with myself starting in January, especially since I get severance pay that will tide me over for a little bit.

My latest idea, that is growing more and more attractive to me, is to go to Colombia for 2 months and really immerse myself in Spanish! I've been studying with my Rocket Spanish mp3's and learning quite a lot, and I understand more and more each week, but I think total immersion would really get me pretty fluent pretty quickly. Plus I'd escape some of the worst part of Iowa winter. Wheeee! And being fluent in Spanish would be a good thing to put on my resume. Even if I don't get a job that requires it, I'll still use it. It would be nice to really talk with G's family.

We're going down for Thanksgiving, for Guri Guri's wedding, so that will be a good time for me to "feel it out" and make sure I'm really up for it. But really, when else in my life will I have the time to do this? It seems like a good idea. A little scary, but exciting!